Digital Funtown - funny,videos,computers,download,digital,college,university,textbooks,iphone,classes,lsat,gre,ringtone,upload, Obama Pushes Lobbyists Off Federal Advisory Boards - 'the President issued Executive Order 13490, which bars anyone appointed by the President who has been a federally-registered lobbyist within the past two years from working on particular matters or in the specific areas in which they lobbied or from serving in agencies they had lobbied. The aspiration we are announcing today builds on this ' Jimi Hendrix's Voodoo Child named best guitar riff - 'Voodoo Child, by Jimi Hendrix has been named the greatest guitar riff of all time, more than 40 years after he first recorded the classic jam. ' Iraqi boy to U.S. soldier: "Will you save me?" - 'He was a young boy living in Iraq when he caught the eye of Maj. David Howell in the Michigan Army National Guard. "Mohammed asked me in plain English, 'Will you save me?' " said Howell, "I felt an obligation as an American to do something for this family." Five months later, Howell got Mohammed a visa, a passport and a commitment from surgeons... ' Americans search for cheaper Thanksgiving trips - 'Millions of Americans got an early jump on their Thanksgiving travel Wednesday, with many opting to drive or take trains and buses instead of shelling out more money for flights amid a sour economy still hitting household budgets hard. ' Iran confiscates rights lawyer's Nobel Peace medal - 'TEHRAN, Iran — Iranian authorities have confiscated Nobel Peace laureate Shirin Ebadi's medal, the human rights lawyer said Thursday, in a sign of the increasingly drastic steps Tehran is taking against any dissent. ' Howie Klein: Blue America's First Endorsement For 2010 - '' Sharmine Narwani: Eleventh-hour CPR On Iran Nuclear Talks - '' Clarence B. Jones: White House Security? - '' Military Divorces Edge Up Again In 9th Year Of War - '' Secret Service: White House Party Crashers Tareq and Michaele Salahi May Face Criminal Charges (PHOTOS) - '' Johann Hari: Why Are These Artists Defending Paedophiles? - '' Gwyneth, Aniston, Salma & More Spend Thanksgiving in Morocco (PHOTOS) - '' Phil Ramone and Danielle Evin: Dog Ears Music: The Family Hasn't Left Yet, Part 2 - '' Phil Ramone and Danielle Evin: Dog Ears Music: The Family Hasn't Left Yet Thanksgiving Playlist - '' Pamela Ezell: Invictus Translation: Obama Needs Rugby - '' Michael Lohan Is A Low Down Deadbeat! - ' As if we are even remotely surprised! Just when we think he couldn't sink any lower, Michael Lohan cannot even practice what he self righteously preaches! After all that shiz about caring for his kids, the deadbeat is $15,000 behind in child support payments for Aliana, Michael Jr and Dakota Lohan. We hope that $$$$$ you [...]' J.Lo Tape Going Public Next Week?! - ' Although Jennifer Lopez filed a $10 million lawsuit against her ex, Ojani Noa, it may not be enough to keep her most private moments from going public. Noa's agent, Ed Meyer, states, "Jennifer Lopez does not want the home videos to be entered into the open court record, where the media and the public can [...]' SuBo Acts Like A Baby! - ' Although she is taking America by storm, it cannot stop the shit storm that is her life! Susan Boyle had ANOTHER breakdown while having lunch at the Rock Centre cafe in NYC's Rockefeller Centre on Monday. Immediately after her performance on the Today show, she was presented with a quilt made by hundreds of people [...]' Amityville Horror AGAIN?! - ' We hope this is a joke! The Amityville Horror was already remade in 2005, but that doesn't mean it is not up for reinterpretation!!!! In a clueless display of movie making, the Weinstein Company and Dimension Films have acquired the rights to remake the already TWICE remade film! And they aren't the only ones with [...]' The Governator Need$ To Pay Up!!!!! - ' We bet he thought no one would ever find out!!! He may think he's above the law, but Arnold Schwarzenegger knows better than to stiff Uncle Sam - especially when his governing state is financially 6 feet under! According to L.A. County Superior Court, the IRS has an active lien against the Governor for $79,064 [...]' FAA releases recordings of wayward jet - 'One of the Northwest Airlines pilots who overshot the Minneapolis airport told air traffic control the crew stopped radio contact because of "cockpit distraction." ' Man sought after 5 shot in Florida - 'Police are searching for a man in connection with the fatal shootings of four people and the wounding of another at a home in Jupiter, Florida. ' Atlantis lands in Florida - 'Space shuttle Atlantis landed at Kennedy Space Center this morning after a mission to deliver spare parts to the international space station. ' Newark runway risks worry feds - 'Federal investigators are concerned a potential danger persists because of the simultaneous use of intersecting runways at Newark Liberty International Airport, one of the nation's busiest and a gateway to the New York metro area. ' Illinois deaths ruled murder-suicide - 'The four people found dead this week in a suburban Chicago home were the victims of a murder-suicide, a coroner said. '

 
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BE CAREFUL WHERE YOU HIDE THE SALAMI

Marriage is a tough. But making the perfect sandwich can be even worse. Watch as this married couple struggles to come to grips with the Salami Situation.

 

But what befalls the salami, I can assure you, you will never see coming...

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Macho Man Randy Savage Smokes Salvia... AND FREAKS OUT!

When is an ex-professional wrestler too irrelevant to experiment with semi-legal hallucinogenic drugs? Apparently at a point further along in Washed-Updom than Randy Savage is. Poor guy couldn't keep his wits about himself once the drugs took hold. Who can blame him? That salvia's powerful shit!

 

His freakout is our entertainment...

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Joaquin Phoenix Stole My Beard!

Celebrities can be inconsiderate douche bags. Like this dude, lives his entire life looking like a bum and then one day -- BOOM! -- suddenly he's a famous bum. And all because some celebrity douche bag decided to not shower for a couple months.Life's a bitch. This dude knows all about it...

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Short Shorts is Now My New Go to Source for Laughter

Oh man, there is no denying how tough it is out there these days. The economy has gone down the toilet to the point where not even the banks have money. Unemployment is rampant. More people are out of work now than at any point in the last couple of decades. It has gotten so bad that businesses are trying to capitalize on unemployment. A national men's clothier is running a deal that if you buy two new suites and lose your job within 60 days you get to keep the suits for free. With the way that the unemployment rate is climbing you would almost be a fool not to jump on those odds. Of course it would be pretty difficult to celebrate your two new free suits while living in your car. That is unless you got a new Hyundai. If you buy a Hyundai and lose your job, they say that they will do you the favor of taking the car back. In That case you lose your job, you lose your car and you’re sleeping down town under a bridge wearing your new suit. Well, at least you’ll still look sharp. You’ll smell real bad, but you’ll look sharp. These are times that might turn a man to drugs. But who can afford drugs? Well, I've found a way to laugh uncontrollably, unavoidably wet myself and escape life’s misery without drugs. And, best of all, it is absolutely free. I just sit back, plug in and take one of my daily hits of my new go to source for laughter, Short Shorts on Digital Funtown. Just about every selection is hilarious. And, if you are at work, just plug in your headphones. Each skit is just a few minutes long so the odds are pretty slim that your boss will catch you. Unless you’re one of those folk that laughs like a rabid hyena. And if you’re among the currently unemployed, then feel free to turn it up and laugh your broke ass off. I use to have CNN saved in my Internet favorites so I could skip over and catch up on what's going on in the world, but, as I said, the world is too miserable for news right now. I don't need to seek out bummers packaged in convenient 5 minute clips. Short Shorts skits are funny and topical. A spot on hit on our current times. For example, recently we got to hear all about the pirates who kidnapped the American Captain and tried to bring him to Somalia (BTW, it seems that kidnapping is now the ONLY way anybody gets to Somalia). Ok, interesting enough, but have you seen Pirate Wheel of Fortune? You can’t see this on CBS. The only place you can see it is on Short Shorts. You see the shtick coming from about a mile away, but it still delivers, "Can I get an aaarrrrrrrgghh?" Sext Messaging hits a little bit too close to home for me to be able to comment on objectively. If Verizon did carry a plan for sext messaging and I were still dating my ex-girlfriend it would be a definite money saver for me. Watch it with someone you love. Another one of my current favorites on Short Shorts is Sitar Hero. This clip is truly inspired. I have lost a few friends to Guitar Hero. They were intelligent, productive people at one time, but I honestly don’t think they have left their house in over a year. If they would actually spend the same amount of time playing an actual guitar they’d be Jimi Hendrix by now, without the rigor mortis. But Sitar Hero takes things to the next logical level. With how serious people take this game and the amount of time they dedicate to it, the possibility of achieving nirvana only seems fair. But my current favorite Short Shorts selection is, without a doubt, March Madness. I love ESPN, I love college basketball, I love Dick Vitale and I love March Madness. But if you ever have a couple days off in the month of March with nothing better to do except sit around and watch 6 or 7 hours of pre-tournament coverage on ESPN you just can help but witness the absurdity of it all. There really is only so much you can say and only so many ways to say it. After a few hours you start to realize that these people are actually saying nothing at all. The guys who did this skit hit the nail right on the head and slammed it home. So, if you want an accurate representation of what’s going on in the world, skip the news sites and tune in to a few clips on Short Shorts. Your life is sad enough as it is, let Short Shorts give you a few tears each day from laughter.  Read Comments..

Coffee and Dick Donuts?

What? You've never heard of a Dick Donut before? Well, don't feel too bad -- neither has Roscoe. Poor guy, he's about to learn a hard lesson about the things he puts into his body. The Dangers of the Dick Donut should not be ignored, the phenomena cannot be explained away, the problem is only GROWING in our modern world. So do yourself a favor and get educated, before the Dick Donut gets YOU!

 

Click below to save your soul. (Or at least your lunch...)

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